Keep It Comin'

“Keep on with the force don’t stop/don’t stop ‘til you get enough”
-Michael Jackson

I keep having weird, thought-provoking dreams. And every morning, when I awake from the sound of my shrieking alarm clock, I have no recollection of them. The hours in the day trail by and with each second that ticks by, the memories of last night’s occurrences come flooding in with great force. Snapshots of images from my dream flicker in and out like a strobe light: bubbles-black-swollen chest-black-ruler-black...but within no time, all the images came together sequentially.

I had foreign objects planted in my chest that were causing me severe pain. I looked down at my chest and on my right side, mountains of dome-shaped bubbles were gurgling on the surface of my skin—I grimaced at the sight. I then looked to the left and what I perceived to be a ruler was implanted underneath my breast tissue. I tugged and pulled at it; what a sight I must have been to be wrestling with something in my own skin. With no success, I slumped in a chair nearby and let the throbbing sensation take over me. I then peered down to notice each metric line of the ruler pressing itself up against my transparent skin. I remember looking for a knife or some sort of sharp object that could relieve me of this agonizing pain, but before I could make a move I was awakened by my shrieking alarm clock.

“To see a ruler in your dream indicates your concerns of not measuring up to the standards of others. It may also mean that you need to be careful in making a decision or judgment.”

I don’t know what to make of this interpretation. Quite frankly I do not live by anyone’s standards other than my own. “Be careful in making a decision or judgment.” I feel like I have been scooped up by two giant hands and placed in the Land of Opportunity—each step I take is another chance to do something I may never get the chance to do again. If I don’t walk these paths—if I don’t explore every inch of this land—I will forever regret throwing away the most uplifting moments I once had. I am blessed. And with each blessing, there comes decisions…decisions that may either make or break me.

Senior year…everything is coming at me at once. Sixty-four days, twenty-two hours, 59minutes and counting until that big foot of Dependency kicks me out into Life. Money, career planning, South Africa, money, relationships, opportunities, New York, money…I am gorging myself, trying to taste a bit of everything on my plate. I'm stressed out, overwhelmed, crying some nights, losing sleep but I can’t stop…I won’t stop: it all tastes soooo damn good.

Jennifer Vassel